May’s newsletter

If you haven’t joined my mailing list yet…you should! I’ve started issuing monthly newsletters again, and I just put out May’s. In addition, you can keep up with blog updates, be apprised of my workshops and other Synergy-related events in the area, and get great pictures like this one, from my own back yard:


I mean, now that’s a tulip.

Happy May, everyone!

Tools for making my workshops more powerful: a critical review of my own Embodied Consent Workshop last month


Image by Thor via Flickr


Last month, I gave a workshop on Embodied Consent, which I talked about a lot in this space. It went relatively well, but I had some criticism for myself, and I’m looking forward to doing it – and other workshops – again with this greater knowledge.

So what didn’t I like? I thought I talked too much. I ran out of time as I often do when I give talks, and couldn’t do all the exercises I wanted to. And as a result, I didn’t give as full and rich a presentation as I’d hoped.

So what would I change? Here are a few ways I plan to make my workshops in general more effective.

First off, I need to remember that giving workshops is not as hard as I think. I have really good material that tends to speak for itself: it’s powerful. I have a lot of material, too, which means I don’t need to worry about filling the time. In fact, I need to worry more about overspilling the time.

What makes workshops easy is letting the participants do a lot of the work for themselves. Every single time I presented them with an exercise, even a little one, they did three things:

  1. Participated fully in the exercise;
  2. Had strong responses to the exercise; and
  3. Had a lot of awesome things to say about it.

When I let my audience have experiences with themselves and each other, then discuss them, it is far more powerful and gets the material across better than if I try to tell them about all of it in advance.

So why do I do that? It’s a question of self-confidence, of trust that what I’m talking about has merit, makes sense, and is resonant for my audience. Even though I know the material is important and resonant, I tend to keep yammering on about it, making a bunch of points and giving too many examples, rather than starting from the place I’m always talking about starting from: the body.

Show, don’t tell, is a super-old lesson, both from theatre and from writing, that I tend to abandon when I’m less sure of myself. But it is basically always true that getting my audience directly involved, even if they’re not sure what they’re doing yet, works far better than over-explaining.

In the next iteration, I’ll start with a few sentences, then an exercise. I’ve realized the structure should go: Short intro, exercise, discussion. Complication: next exercise, discussion. No more than 5-10 minutes of explanation before going on to another experiential piece. The experiential pieces tend to be so rich that the explanation does itself, after the fact.

It also empowers my audience, allowing them to collaborate with me and come to their own conclusions rather than being spoon-fed my ideas, which they might not be quite ready for, because they haven’t found them with their own bodies and minds.

So that’s my goal. Looking forward to the next one. Let me know if you’d like me to come give a workshop at your event, meetup, organization or workplace! A new page with my offerings is coming soon, but I teach about Finding your Yes, No, and Maybe;  Body-Centered Performance; and Restoring Your Personal Power. I can also design workshops for your particular needs. Contact me here!



Come have a sample session this Saturday in Arlington!

Image 1This Saturday, the Theosophical Society is holding their annual Day of Healing and Insight. This means that there are a bunch of practitioners of various modalities hanging out in one place, and you can pay $25 to have a 25-minute session with any of them!

Well, this time I’m included in this, and I’ll be there on Saturday from 1:30 – 4pm. Come by and get a brief, hands-on introduction to my work!

Here’s the full scoop. Sign up with them, but do let me know if you’re planning to come! Email me at

When   Saturday, March 21, (9am – 5pm)
Where  21 Maple St., Arlington, MA

Morning sessions on the half hour from 10 to 12:30:

Jennifer Badot: Tarot Readings
Stefan Meyer: The Ancient Science of the Cards
Kate Rafferty: Transformational Kinesiology
Darlene Slagle: Akashic Record Readings
Rene Schweisow: Intuitive Readings Using Tarot, Runes, and Chakra Stones
Carolyn Romano: Native American Sacred Path Intuitive Card Readings

Afternoon sessions on the half hour from 1:30 to 4:
Judy Tsafrir: Tarot Readings
Kamela Dolinova: Rubenfeld Synergy Method
Rene Schweisow: Intuitive Readings Using Taror, Runes, and Chakra Stones
Andrew Fieleke: Focusing Techniques “Clearing a Space”
Janet Kessenich: Sound Healing & Chakra Balancing

Please email us at with your requests for sessions.
Your inquiry will be returned as quickly as possible –
though we ask you to understand that we are all volunteers whose schedules
may not allow us to respond immediately.

BY PHONE: If you prefer to speak by phone, email us with your phone number
and we’ll work out a mutually convenient time to connect.

PAYMENT: Pre-payment is required to hold your reserved sessions.
Payment forms include check and Paypal.

New Site in progress!

Hello, everyone! If you’ve reached this page, it’s because I’m working on porting my WordPress blog over to this site to act as my main site. Everything is going to look a little awkward while it’s in transition, so please, bear with me!

You can still see my full site at, and you can contact me at

I hope to hear from you soon. 🙂

How can you keep those resolutions going?

Happy New Year!

For many, coming out of the dark time of the Winter Solstice and into the New Year is a time of renewal. After the excesses of the holidays, we look back at the year behind us and make promises to ourselves. This year, we say, we’ll be better. Stronger, fitter, thinner, richer. We’ll pay attention to our loved ones more, we’ll meditate every day. And often, it isn’t too long before those resolutions fall by the wayside, and we’re back to our old habits.

Synergists believe that our habits are a result of messages that are deeply embedded in our bodies. Just as we learn the most basic things – walking, running, driving – through repetition and muscle memory, so other things get embedded in our bodies. Our habits become, as it were, automated. These habits can be positive: people who make a habit of running in the mornings, for example, often report the automatic feeling of getting out of bed, getting their gear and shoes on, going out the door and letting their feet take them, regardless of the weather. But if you’re like many of us, you probably recognize negative habits more easily: your hand reaching into the potato chip bag while watching a comforting TV show, or raising your voice when someone you love does that annoying thing you hate. Recovering alcoholics sometimes talk about the way their bodies would stand up, walk to where they kept their liquor, open a bottle, pour a drink, and begin sipping it, all without thinking.

Our bodies are excellent at automating processes: it’s why most of us don’t have to think about how to walk every time we walk to the kitchen, nor how to drive to our workplaces when we’ve been driving there every day for more than a month. Unfortunatey, though, this automation means that we can end up living lives that are largely *unconscious*: we get up, eat, go to work, raise our families, all without thinking. We get stuck in habits that harm us: we drink too much, or eat junk, or ignore our loved ones, or cheat on our spouses.

Many clients I see come in with the question, “Why do I keep doing this thing, when I know that it’s bad for me and makes me feel awful?” By teaching them to listen to their bodies’ messages, I help them to move out of their unhealthy habits and into *choice*. When you begin to listen to your body, to really pay attention, you can find the triggers for those automated processes – and short-circuit them. Even more than that: you can learn to program new, better habits into your system, so that you can make those resolutions stick.

If you’re interested in making a change, contact me for a free phone consultation, or make an appointment. I look forward to keeping in touch throughout a renewing, transformative 2014!

My wishes to you for the holidays

christmasIt’s a week until Christmas, for those who celebrate; two weeks until the New Year, and just a few days until the Winter Solstice, the longest night of the year. It’s a time when family and friends gather against the cold and the dark, which is the birth of every holiday that has sprung up around this time of year in the Northern Hemisphere. During this time, we need to hold tight to one another, as humans have done for warmth and companionship for untold millennia. In this festive yet often harried season, it’s easy to forget what we’re really celebrating.

Get some rest.

The holidays may not seem like a relaxing time for many: all the shopping, gift wrapping, cooking, decorating, and traveling we’re expected to do can become so stressful that we forget the “holiday” part.

Take some time to yourself. Find an empty room, a cup of hot chocolate, or whatever brings you comfort and joy. Close your eyes. Remember to breathe. Take a bubble bath. Make sure you’re getting enough sleep. Take a walk by yourself, or with one other person you trust. Give yourself the gift of centeredness.

Reconnect with loved ones.

I just wrote an article over at the sex and relationships site YourTango about 5 ways to get your juices flowing over the holidays. Go check it out, and learn how to keep charged in this stressful season.

Prepare for a bright new year.

This time is wonderful for clearing out the cobwebs, saying goodbye to old things that no longer serve you, and welcoming in the blessings of a new dawn. Though the time in the calendar may be arbitrary, the ritual around celebrating the new year has enough energy around it all over the world that it carries a kind of magic.

Do a ritual of release for the old year: burn representations of the things you want to let go of, clean out your closets and give old things to charity, raise a glass to things to come.

In the new year, look for more frequent updates from me, and a newly integrated blog and website. I look forward to keeping in better touch!